Category Archives: Archetypes

Erotic Archetype Segment Therapy

bookThe purpose of archetype erotic training is to allow a person to enter into, as far as possible, their full life power by means of releasing and accessing every form and major location of energetic expression that can take place within the body.

Women have three major energetic archetypes in connecting with men:

  1. Maiden – Beauty, sexuality, attracting
  2. Mother – Comforting, nurturing, healing
  3. Crone – Wisdom, counseling, tempering

Another that is accessed as a general state as these three are brought into balance: the Queen.

Men have three major energetic archetypes when dealing with women as well:

  1. Lover – Feelings, senses, and emotions
  2. Warrior – Action in the world. Doing, achieving, solving problems.
  3. Sage – Understanding, knowing, and being.

As these are brought into balance, a fourth manifests: the King.

Each of these male archetypes, for example, contains two unhealthy variations.

  • Lover – Playboy / Victim – Either through total dependence on love and sensual pleasures or an abandoning of this section to other energies.
  • Warrior – Bully/Pushover – Either through dependence on force to get energy or inaction.
  • Sage – Trickster/Dolt – Either by Using Wisdom or Knowledge as a way to avoid connection or action OR by lazily avoiding a study of the Truth in the World for Sharing.

If a woman would like to invite a man into the healthy archetype from the shadow version of the archetype, she must approach him from the healthy version of the corresponding female archetype. Therefore:

  • To invite a playboy or a victim to transform into a lover, use the maiden energy.
  • To invite a bully or a pushover to transform into a warrior, you must first use the mother energy.
  • To invite a trickster or a dolt to transform into an sage, utilize the crone energy.

The methodology for bringing these archetypes into balance is described in my book “The Total Man and Complete Woman” available at Amazon in paperback. Kindle version here.

The Splitting of the Female Archetype

Ever notice how a woman in our society is allowed to be sexy or intelligent, but not both?

Beautiful models are only allowed to be seen, not to speak. They don’t participate in issues. They don’t go to debates.

Intelligent women are not allowed to act overtly sexy (on company time).

And mothers are not really allowed to be either—they raise children and are not really welcome to participate in the active structuring of corporations, governments, or other organizations—not if they are going to be seen as ‘good mothers’.

Why is this?

Because an integrated woman possesses incredible power which is absolutely terrifying for everyone else—men and women.

Remember the story of the crabs?

If you put one crab in a bucket, he will crawl out. But if you have two crabs in a bucket, just as the first one is making some headway, the second one will put the first down and back in.

This is how we work in society. We want people to be like us. At the moment where they express unusually more power, initiative, competence, or whatever than we have, we become jealous.

If we see them as too inferior, weak, incompetent, we become judge – mental. In either case, we distance ourselves from them inside.

The combination of these two elements is what is referred to as the sin of pride (sin denoting a false way of seeing).

This fundamental split in the energies that a woman is allowed to possess and express has been termed the “Lilith Complex” by German psychologist Hans-Jürgen Maaz.

Lilith was Adam’s first wife, according to Jewish mythology. She was a powerful, sexual woman who wasn’t interested in children. More importantly, she saw herself as Adam’s equal. Rather than put up with the competition, Adam asked God to take her away and provide another—which was done. Eve was docile, obedient, and loved motherhood and children. Now Adam could relax.

Lilith was forever banned into the wilderness.

And that is where she has stayed until this day. She remains there as our concept of “a good mother” is colored into someone who doesn’t overtly display her sexuality (much less do anything ‘kinky’ or ‘wild’), who is peaceful, and gentle and loving and…motherly! The positive qualities are as clear to us as they are cliché. If our mother wasn’t like that (if she was out in discos persuing pleasure instead of at home taking care of us), we wish she would have been. If she is like that, she is honored and revered by society (you know about Mother’s day. You have never heard of Maiden Day, Slut Day, Crone/Witch (wise woman) day…) A good mother puts others first and does not complain about the burdens placed upon her.

But if she is never allowed to be overtly sexual or powerfully shape society, it is easy to understand the frustration (perhaps indicated by the quantity of antidepressants women and especially mothers take in our society) she feels at the lack of expression she has (self-expression being one of the needs from Maslow’s famous hierarchy).

As long as one or more of the key parts of being a woman is denied to almost all women in our society, each woman individually will suffer from the lack of balance of her expression and society suffers from its inability to receive the gifts that are available from a woman who is integrated and comfortable with every portion of her self.

Healing the Split

So, how do we fix this?

How do women:

  • Reclaim their inner power as a sexual being (often derogatorily labeled as “slut” or “whore”)
  • Manifest their powers of wisdom openly in society (without unnerving or losing the interest of males)

…while retaining the ability to also express the nurturing and “mothering” which is also a key part of the female psyche?

What Women Want from Men: The Sage

Every woman needs three things from Man*:

  • A Lover
  • A Warrior and
  • A Sage

Unfortunately, society has trained her to believe that she needs to find all of these, perfectly balanced in *one* man while at the same time subjecting all men to the conditioning which results in them usually being unbalanced in all three.

Let’s take a look at it. A lover feels. He is sensitive, emotional. He touches a woman’s heartstrings, plays beautiful melodies with her body. He is romantic and sensitive.

The Warrior is a “get things done” guy. He goes and and does what needs to be done. He fights the battle–no matter the risk. He protects his woman at all times.

A sage is wise. He has the right answers. The right advice. He tempers the emotional swings and encourages her to wait and think about things.

Women: of all of these three, the easiest to get (and therefore, the one no woman should live without) is the sage. What does a sage do? How does he function in a girl’s life?

The sage provides feedback about every major decision a woman is thinking about making. He listens thoughtfully and presently. He doesn’t judge. And often, he can help her find a better, more optimal, or more fulfilling way to do what she wants to do. He serves as an Oracle of the Masculine to the woman.

A woman will look for a sage who is matched to her level of [spiritual] development and experience. A sage for a 15-year-old may have different answers than a sage would for a 45-year-old. Two different sage’s answers may be contradictory, depending upon the level of the asker and the hearer, nonetheless, their answers will be what a woman needs to hear right now.

What have your experiences been with sages? So, who is your sage? Do you have a sage? How did you find him?*



* Yes, I know.

No woman is really interested in a “relationship”…much less “marriage”.

No woman is really interested in a “relationship”…much less “marriage”. Not at her core.

No man is either.

What they are interested in is in fulfilling their need to serve in their archetypal roles. A woman can nurture. This is like rivers running to the ocean and birds singing. This is what she does. If she does not nurture at all, she is not fully a woman. She feels this. She feels somehow empty. She feels that something is missing.

This is the need which needs to be fulfilled. Marriage. Boyfriend. These are only strategies to fulfill this need. And they are usually poor strategies. Because she does not see the need clearly that she is trying to fulfill. And because no balance can be held because no consciousness is held in these defined and labeled connections.

Instead, she feels as a slave. A slave to how her mother did things. A slave to convention. The expectations of her partner. This is not what she wanted at all!

Seeing only those two options—relationships that seem as oasis but in reality are slavery—and being alone and leaving the expression of her femininity totally unexpressed, she can easily despair of ever being able to be a true woman in this life.

This is where many Western women are.


Why do We Use Stories and Myths to Define Archetypes?

If we say, “a hero needs to be devoted, tireless, and dedicated” no one besides us will have a clear picture of what a hero does–everyone’s interpretation of devoted and dedicated can be different.

If I tell you the story of the hero, however, and you see what he does and why he does it, and, by inference, you see how to do it, too.

Stories provide a lot of information is very little space about a situation or an interaction. It can express multiple variables without resorting to massive exact explanation.

If a princess is kidnapped by a dragon, a king sends out for a hero, and a hero accepts the quest to save her, we can identify with the probable feelings of the princess , the king, and the hero (though not so much with the dragon), the difficulties and danger the hero will face to rescue the princess, and much more. If I simply said, “A certain person was having a difficult time and needed some help,” all of this information would not be evident.

If we are told this story by our parents or others to whom we have a bond, we will unconsciously receive the message that they want us to assimilate the characteristics of the hero in the story and act in similar ways.