Category Archives: Healing

The Main Issue: Domination and Authority

We live in a world created for us by our culture.  Here, world doesn’t refer to the planet. It refers to how we see things.

Our culture’s primary doctrine is the domination system.

In a domination system, we tell others ‘below us’ what to do. Parents command children. Bosses command employees. Generals command soldiers. Lawmakers command the populace. The domination system is built on one central idea:

  “1) There is a right way to do things and 2) someone knows what that is.” (Marshall Rosenberg)

If we accept this idea, then the only question left is whose domination we will accept.

Who knows what is best for us? Our priest? Our president? Our king? Our father?

Most of the time, when we move towards so-called ‘freedom’, we simply substitute one ruler in our lives for another. Even when we try to live ‘our inner truth’, we find what we seem to want from moment to moment is contradictory, confusing, and the results of looking for it frightening.

The idea of “the right way” is so deeply ingrained in us in so many ways, dropping it is a monumental task.

The patriarchal system of the past 5000 years or so has also, in its determination of what is right, fundamentally denied all persons (but especially women) their power.

My work is dedicated to the opening and rediscovery of our inner power individually so that we can reclaim our power and build a better world together.

Several forms of healing, consciousness and awareness expansion can be used for this.

And perhaps the fastest way to do this is through meditations, such as those found in the Vigyan Bhairav tantra.

Once we have dropped the bonds holding us back in our power, we can begin exercising our energetic flexibility and power in getting what we want (meeting our core needs) in this world.

This will enable us all to work from a level of openness and completion that was previously known only to very few.

Are Gurus Good?!?

I was watching ‘Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition’ last night and had some thoughts…

This extremely fat woman (355 lbs) wrote this fitness guru asking for his help in losing weight.

So he shows up and takes her on.

She has to do *everything* he tells her to do. 1500 kcal per day. Lots and lots of exercise. He brings in someone who teaches her to cook and teaches her portioning as well

He completely remodels her house and removes all of the old triggers for food, installs a garden, puts fitness machines all over the place (this while she wasn’t home so she didn’t even know/couldn’t complain).

She starts ‘working’ with him and immediately hits her wall. She is in tears. She is crying. No, she is wailing! “I can’t do it! I can’t do it!” All the emotional stuff comes up (it was after a rape at age 14 that she began gaining weight).

And he brings her back to 1) Her commitment 2) Her motivations for her commitment.

He pushes her. He motivates her. He screams at her when necessary. Not too much comforting, but he does give her a hug when she is brave enough to look at her weight for the first time.

Well *WE*, my dear friends, are that 355 lb woman. We aren’t happy. Everything in our lives is not going as we want.

Everything around us is coddling us and selling us more junk food to temporarily ease the pain without confronting what is really going on inside of us.

We need someone to show us the way out. We know someone who has confronted reality, been there, and gone the journey. Someone who knows when to kick our butts and when to give us a pat on the butt.

This, my friends, is the guru of the eastern tradition.

For our emotional and spiritual pain it is just as intelligent and legitimate to take a guide through the process of healing as it is for this woman to use this guy.

Could she have done it alone? No. She didn’t have the knowledge, the energy, the resources, the motivation. She had tried with abysmal results for 20 years.

There is nothing wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with asking for help. There is nothing wrong with admitting our weakness, our powerlessness, our helplessness. There is nothing wrong with needing someone else or with trusting someone else to show us through the darkness of the path we have never trod.

017 – 4 Main Feelings + Mind / Body / Spirit “Emotions”

What is the difference between pleasure, joy, happiness, ecstasy and bliss? How are the body, mind, and consciousness or spirit related to each of these?

What are the four main emotions and how do we classify them?

When thinking about your emotions, there are many words but really only 4 main categories: mad, glad, sad, and afraid.

Understanding these can help you be present and work with them more effectively.

Running Away Through Action

I recently watched a rather intense therapy/catharsis session that was filmed at Osho’s Pune ashram in 1979. As I watched, the words came to me: “Awareness is watching.”

I was wondering how effective the session in question would be at resolving emotional blocks.

Someone asked this question:

“When you feel pockets of energy, stuck areas, etc, expressing themselves… you say to give them space. Does this involve screaming if that’s what happens, or raging, or crying,or beating cushions, or getting up and dancing, etc? Or are you suggesting to stay lying down and somewhat calmer?”

About the emotional self-empathy exercise. Basically the question is:

“Do I repress the emotion by holding my body still or do I repress the emotion by jumping about and carrying on?”

Repression in this case equals not being present with what is there. If some subtle emotion or pain comes up somewhere, we can repress and drown it  out(and the very real fear connected to it)  with overly-dramatic reactions

Contrary to popular belief in many healing circles, more screaming, punching, and “visible emotion” does not necessarily equal more healing or emotional release. Very often, it is simply another form of repression or escape from what is really present. Or, another form of “acceptable acting” for the situation in question.

Banging on mattresses or screaming only gives us permission to feel what is inside–sometimes! It doesn’t resolve anything that is not present in this moment.

Which is why you can beat on mattresses and scream 100 times without being able to overcome the emotion of anger towards your mother.

So, as you experience any healing or therapeutic intervention, stay very present with what the body is feeling in that moment.  Breathe into your belly–as fast as you feel is necessary to process the pain or emotion. The healing may take place though nothing much is externally vidible.  And follow the body–do not dictate to it. It will do naturally what is required.